& then I died

we all come across a reasonable moment in life when you look back and think 'I have lost alot of myself'. But if your anything like me your twenty years old looking back and saying 'wow I finally found myself'. When you spend seventeen years of your life trying on everyone elses identity you lose complete focus of who you really are. In my experience I tried to be the single minded prep, the insatiable emo girl, the girl next door. the althetic chick, ect. ect. ect. But leaving highschool taught me alot. The people who were veiwed as the 'in' crowd where the ones who were confident and so egotistical about themselves it was a miracle their head fit through the doors every morning. So as I ventured out in life and started to explore myself I gained confidence. Now your probably wondering why I seem so sarcastic, or so 'rebellious teen', and here is why: I cant be friends with anyone without them developing feelings. I know that probably makes me sound like a complete air head but its true! Its a stupid cycle I have gone through more than your favorite shirt through the wash cycle. I befriend someone, hang out with them, they develope feelings, I am stupid so I entertain those emotions, then they eventually hate me, we spend weeks not speaking, then they come back into my life with what I am starting to believe is an agenda for revenge. I dont quite understand what the hell the universe has against me but this has been my cycle for two years and honestly its soooo old. So I dare all of you bloggers, stalkers, and even some of you midnight account makers to follow me on an adventure where the old me dies and I become 'that girl'